Ladies and Gentlemen of the Guangzhou Hash,
September, the 8th. When this date is mentioned the International Literacy Day without fail springs to mind. On this date, when I was a child, my dad would summon the whole family, and together we would commemorate the illiterate half of our family. My mum would always bake a yummy cake topped with self-picked apples to mark the occasion. I’m certain many of you have similarly fond feelings of this special day, and therefore the mismanagement declares Saturday’s run the ‘Literate Hash’.
If you don’t have such fond memories of that day, because instead of spoiling you with cake your parents would force you to learn to read and write, you can still cum to the Hash. Maybe you have grandparents in the US or in Canada, or maybe even in Estonia? It’s their special day, too, and for them we can call the upcuming Hash the Alternative National Grandparents’ Run. If your grandparents are literate you can even send them your best wishes by an embarrassing email from someone’s smart phone, and assure them how hard you are celebrating their special day. However this is just an alternative motto. The main reason for Saturday’s run is the celebration of the International Literacy Day, and the education of the under-privileged members of the GZH3.
‘Education?’ you probably call out in disbelief when you are deciphering this.
Rest assured we do this for a good purpose. Shockingly enough, we ourselves have a lot of hashers on the GZH3 who can barely decipher the beer price list at the Gold Mango Bar. This revelation called for immediate action, and the mismanagement formed a think tank (with a literacy rate above 60%) to cum up with some ideas how to encourage people to read stuff other than the just mentioned list, and to emphasize the increasing importance of basic reading and writing skills in the modern society.
From the Internet the think tank learnt that people usually have to be forced to do what is good for them. Therefore, the think tankers decided to cancel the weekly Hash press conference at the Mango Bar late last night. During what was not a Hash press conference, but still took place at the Mango late last night, Floppy announced, that no announcement would be made on any run details during the purely informal get-together.
‘If you want to know time and place then you better read the godsdam hashvertisement,’ he advised an overwhelmingly illiterate crowd.
And so, without further ado, I reveal everything you need to know for Saturday. If you can’t read it, go back to school.
When: Saturday, September 8th, 2012 @ 1.30 PM
Where: Gold Mango Bar
What: The Literate Hash
Who: Floppy Disk, plus one or two