Ladies and Gentlemen of the Guangzhou Hash,
There has been a lot of grumbling and dissension among the Full Moon hashers about poor planning and poor timing of our recent runs. The point of having a Full Moon Hash is to…above all else…actually be running underneath a full moon*. Some of our more recent hares on the GZFMH3 have been disregarding this idea entirely, setting hash runs one, two…sometimes THREE days away from the actual full moon. It’s a travesty…a sham…a mockery. It’s traveshamockery and, goddamnit, we’ve had enough!
Not only has GZFMH3 GM Gorf arranged for next week’s hash to be set on the actual date of the full moon, he’s pulled some astronomical strings so that the exact time of the full moon will be during our run. That’s right…at exactly 8:00pm and 54 seconds, you’ll feel the hairs on the back of your neck stand up, your libido surge, and receive a burst of psychedelic cosmic energy** as you try to track down the hare.
Speaking of the hare, Gorf was also adamant that everyone attend because, according to him, this week’s hare is the best-looking, funniest, best down down-giving, and certainly the most modest of all the hares in all of Guangzhou. With a little luck, he might even set the Best FM Hash of 2016 because…with a little help from above…he’s cosmically aligned to do just that.
* Fun fact: there actually IS a moon in Guangzhou. It’s that fuzzy white cloud of carcinogenic pollution that is a little brighter than the other carcinogenic pollution.
** Damnit…hanging around Shoeless too much. Beginning to sound like him.
See you tomorrow at the GZH3, and On On Wednesday for cosmic and hashing perfection!
What: GZFMH3 Run #118: The Cosmic Alignment Hash
Hare: Three Inches of Pain
When: Wednesday, March 23, 7:30PM
Where: Lujiang Exit B (Line 8)
–Three Inches of Pain