Category: 2018

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2018 Full Moon Hash

GZFMH3 Full Moon Run #143 – The Instant Hash

Ladies & “Gentlemen” of the Guangzhou Hash,

Modern society – for better or worse – is all about instant gratification. We can have Meituan delivered to our door in minutes, Skype with our grandmothers for hours, and access high-definition RedTube for 37 seconds at a time. If you’re as talented as Turtlehead, you can even accomplish all three at the same time.

Sticking to its ethos and mission of developing a better world for the human race, the Guangzhou Full Moon Hash additionally looks to make things as instant as possible. In this week’s full moon hash, the lightning-fast hare will only be given a 5-minute head start before the pack goes after him. If…and I must emphasize the IF…the hare is caught, the hasher who catches him becums the new hare and gets a few minutes to set a trail in a new direction before being caught.

What: GZ Full Moon Run #143 – The Instant Hash

When: Wednesday, May 16th, 7PM Meet, 7:30 On On!

Where: Wuyangcun Metro Exit A

Trail: A to B

Hares: Three Inches of Pain

On On Wednesday!

Categories
2018

GZH3 Run # 1487: The Two Girls, One Mud Hash

 

Ladies and ‘Gentlemen’ of the GZ Hash,

As you are probably aware from the last 10 days of constant rain, spring cums on GZ with a roar of thunder and a spending of its load (of rain, get your mind out of the gutter). This provides you perfect conditions for sliding slopes, natural showers, and mud fights. Hiking Club gets all wet and wanting this time of year …
So she grabbed a spring Virgin, Just Gustina, and introduce her to the joys of long showers and the health benefits of rubbing mud on each other…
Better Cum on Saturday for there is nothing better to keep the moisture of your skin than a wet and dirty trail combined with Beer, Rio and Pool.

What: GZH3 Run #1487: The Two Girls, One Mud Hash
When: May 12th 1:00PM SHARP!!!
Where: Mango Bar Taojin Exit B (Line 5)
Hare: Hiking Club & Just Gustina
Bring: Fresh Socks and Shirts, Swimsuit and Towel

On On!
– The Hares

Disclaimer: China and hashing can be dangerous activities. The organizers of the Guangzhou Hash accept no liability for anything that happens before, during or after the Hash.

Categories
2018

Run #1483: ‘The Sweatin’ and Swimmin’ Hash’

Categories
2018

GZH3 Run # 1482: The Not Yet Fucking Hot Hash

Categories
2018

GZH3 Run # 1481: The Birthday Brunch Hash

Categories
2018

GZH3 Run # 1480: The Rest and Relaxation Hash

Categories
2018

GZH3 Run #1478: The Good for Healthy Hash

Categories
2018

Run #1477: ‘The T*erm L*mit & Hippie Hunter Fuckoff Hash’

Ladies and “Gentlemen” of the Guangzhou Hash,


For the past 6 months and during his previous year-long internment in Canton, Hippie Hunter has becum one of the stalwart hares and degenerates of the Guangzhou Hash. Overcoming disastrous circumstances like a bum ankle, waking up on the curb outside the Strand most Saturday mornings, and receiving his haring tutelage from Hunkaspunk, Hippie has ascended through the ranks and is now known and trusted to set long, hard, and excellent trails on a nearly-weekly basis. He’s becum so well-known and revered for his trails that the Hashers of Guangzhou have cheered for Hippie Hunter to set runs in perpetuity – that he becum Hare-4-Lyfe!
However, unlike other positions of prestige in this great land, the Mismanagement of the Guangzhou Hash has recognized that appointing a ‘Hare-4-Lyfe’ brings with it some potentially-harmful consequences: there’s the chance that Hippie Hunter one day might accuse fellow hashers of short-cutting so that they sit on the ice in his stead; he could possibly change the trail rules so that he can never be caught while haring; and he might even exaggerate flour and taxi receipts so that his offspring might comfortably attend famous institutions of higher learning in Cambridge, Massachusetts.
With these unintended consequences in mind, the Mismanagement sees a motion to hereby banish Hippie Hunter from the Guangzhou Hash until he sets one more best trail ever, gives us mercy by getting his ass back to Merceyside, and finally finishes his degree instead of wallowing around with co-eds at SCNU.
Those in favour? Aye.
Those opposed? ***crickets***
Seeing one ‘aye’ and none opposed, this motion unanimously passes. Fuck off you wank.
 
What: GZH3 Run #1477: The Term Limit & Hippie Hunter Fuckoff Hash
When: March 3rd – 1:00PM SHARP!
Where: The Mango Bar – Taojin Exit B (Line 5)
Hares: Hippie Hunter, Three Inches of Pain, & VIRGIN HARE Just Gustina
Bring: 50rmb for the Hash, 60rmb for dinner, and a farewell ‘tribute’ to HH.
 
On On!
-Three Inches of Pain
Categories
2018 Uncategorized

GZH3 Run #1477: The Butt Sculptor Hash

Categories
2018

Run #1477: ‘The Term Limit & Hippie Hunter Fuckoff Hash’

Ladies and “Gentlemen” of the Guangzhou Hash,

For the past 6 months and during his previous year-long internment in Canton, Hippie Hunter has becum one of the stalwart hares and degenerates of the Guangzhou Hash. Overcoming disastrous circumstances like a bum ankle, waking up on the curb outside the Strand most Saturday mornings, and receiving his haring tutelage from Hunkaspunk, Hippie has ascended through the ranks and is now known and trusted to set long, hard, and excellent trails on a nearly-weekly basis. He’s becum so well-known and revered for his trails that the Hashers of Guangzhou have cheered for Hippie Hunter to set runs in perpetuity – that he becum Hare-4-Lyfe!


However, unlike other positions of prestige in this great land, the Mismanagement of the Guangzhou Hash has recognized that appointing a ‘Hare-4-Lyfe’ brings with it some potentially-harmful consequences: there’s the chance that Hippie Hunter one day might accuse fellow hashers of short-cutting so that they sit on the ice in his stead; he could possibly change the trail rules so that he can never be caught while haring; and he might even exaggerate flour and taxi receipts so that his offspring might comfortably attend famous institutions of higher learning in Cambridge, Massachusetts.

With these unintended consequences in mind, the Mismanagement sees a motion to hereby banish Hippie Hunter from the Guangzhou Hash until he sets one more best trail ever, gives us mercy by getting his ass back to Merceyside, and finally finishes his degree instead of wallowing around with co-eds at SCNU.

Those in favour? Aye.
Those opposed? ***crickets***

Seeing one ‘aye’ and none opposed, this motion unanimously passes. Fuck off you wank.

What: GZH3 Run #1477: The Term Limit & Hippie Hunter Fuckoff Hash
When: March 3rd – 1:00PM SHARP!
Where: The Mango Bar – Taojin Exit B (Line 5)
Hares: Hippie Hunter, Three Inches of Pain, & VIRGIN HARE Just Gustina
Bring: 50rmb for the Hash, 60rmb for dinner, and a farewell ‘tribute’ to HH.

On On!

-Three Inches of Pain